Below is what will be read tonight by Rev. Neal Smith at the service. The service will be held at 8:30 pm at my house (message Linda DeLoach on FB for directions).
Legacy.
The reason everyone has gathered here tonight is to honor a legacy. To fulfill a promise, to remember a leader, mentor, father, husband, and friend. We go through life hoping to make a difference, hoping to be a part of something bigger than us. To change a life, to change lives, to change the world in one little way for the best. This is the longing of man. However this is not the end of man. This is not the ultimate purpose of why we are here. The ultimate purpose is to glorify God. This is the end of man.
My father knew this. He knew that his ultimate legacy, his purpose was to bring glory to God. For man to be anything less would be a waste of life. To waste life is not to live life to its fullest. However, we don’t always live our lives to their fullest. Often God’s calling begins as an unknown feeling, then it is followed by a whisper, a nudge, a shout, a push, and finally a drop. A drop into an ocean that makes us feel that we are over our heads. The feeling that we can’t swim and we won’t make it.
My dad experienced this drop. I experienced this drop, we all experienced this drop. This drop was not a call for just him to live life to its fullest but all of us. Many of us here have heard the words “I have cancer” spoken by a loved one. Some here have heard the words, you have cancer. This is a drop, a call, a unexplained crazy God thing that shows how wrathful and loving our God is. For we are a part of His creation. We are his creation; we out of all creation are the only thing that is created in his image. Our purpose is to bring glory to God.
To bring Glory to God means to love his creation, to appreciate his creation, to embrace life, to appreciate his beauty in all of life in everything we do. These can fulfill their selves in many ways. However, all of us are called to serve, and to love. We love because He first loved us. We love one another. But what does it mean to love one another?
To love one another is to forgive. Forgiveness is something my dad strived hard to do. He prayed for the abilility to forgive. Because he knew that he was forgiven from his lack of love, his lack of compassion, his sin. He forgave people when others asked why. He forgave those who had once hurt him the most. He loved. He knew that that was what they needed, what the world needed. For forgiveness is to love, to love is to forgive, but love is more than forgiveness. Love is an appreciation.
Appreciation, I can remember a time when I was in Florida in early March and it began snowing outside. He began to cry at the beauty of the snow. He felt the beauty in God’s creation. Something as simple as snow. Today I felt the same beauty of creation. I looked out over the Tuscan countryside and began to cry at the beauty of God’s creation. Another moment that sticks out to me are the times that me and my dad would stay up late nights talking about life. Our conversations would start in one point and go so far off trail and we would begin to talk about the world. The world that we lived in, the problems, both close to us and globally. However, something that he would always come to the point of saying is that they were God’s creation and at the core of them was something beautiful.
My dad was not concerned with his legacy. He did not stay up at night wondering how he would impact the world. He did not stress over the little things in life, particularly after his battle with cancer began. He did not do these things because he knew that God was greater than anything he could imagine. For he knew that he was created by and part of the creator of all creation, he knew that the same creator of the sun, moon, and stars created him. He knew that he was much more important in his heavenly Father’s eyes than any other creatures. He would constantly remind me of this fact. Not to worry about tomorrow… “Son, Oh ye of little faith” he would say. He reminded me that I was called to walk by faith even when I could not see the path before me. For this is what it means to walk by faith, to trust, to believe in God and his pre-destined plan.
The emotions and hurt we have felt last year have been filed into our memory. And like a good wine, over time will slowly dissipate until a death becomes just a death and a life becomes just a life. However, a death is not a death, and a life is not just a life. They are something more than that. But do not mourn him not being here. For he is in a much better place. Heaven became more real, more tangible last year than ever before. To see tears stream down his face as he mumbled his lips to form the words “this is beautiful” and handed us all handfuls of gold as his face lit up in the darkness and coldness of death. For death is beautiful, when we leave the physical world, the sorrow, stress, disease, and hurt for the spiritual world where true beauty reigns. For as beautiful as this world is, I know that it is nothing compared to what my dad is experiencing. Our sorrow, hurt and pain over his death is not because he is not here, I believe it is our spirit crying out that we are not there. He is healed, he isn’t a survivor for there is nothing to survive. He is a spirit, a soul singing to the glory of God in the most beautiful melody any of us can imagine.
So as everyone continues to gather, do not weep, do not hurt. Miss yes, but anything more, no. For see his death as a call to live. All of our lives have been altered by his death. Some of ours in major ways, other minor. However, no matter how great of an impact of his death on our lives see it as a call to live. For with every death comes a new life that we live. It is the choice that we make to either sulk in our sorrows or use it to propel us to something greater than we can imagine. Just as my dad altered his outlook on life the day that he was given a death sentence to pursue a life that would touch countless lifes. For in the twinkling of an eye all who have lived and died will be raised to live forever.
To God Be the Glory.
Matt
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Matthew - once again, I am touched by the profound words you speak and write. Your dad was, without a doubt, one of the finest men I have ever had the pleasure of knowing. Even in the midst of his own battle, he would let me come to him and pour out my heart and listen to me talk about my own struggle, that, at the time, seemed to be a symbol of my world coming to an end. Obviously, my "struggle" paled in comparison to his. While your dad may not have cared about what his legacy was, he certainly left a mark on so many, including me and my family. Once again, I say that I know your dad is smiling down from above with great pride over the well spoken and fine young man you have become. Take care! The Kirby's
ReplyDeleteThanks Crissie,
ReplyDeleteI can remember countless times when my dad would spend more time thinking about other's battles and hard times instead of his own, including your own. Take care as well!